Financially she knew she could not stay in the house alone after he left. Though they had not yet talked about what she would keep and what he would keep, she was certain he would be fair when it came to the house. Her concern was that her father, who had handed them land without hesitation, would be upset at the prospect of it now leaving the family.
The home was an ego boosting build, boasting four bedrooms and two and a half baths. There was a formal dining room and living room with an oversized family room and eat-in kitchen. Upon entering the home, many people could not believe that a couple so young owned it. The walls were richly painted in slate colored greens and buttery yellows. Warm hard wood floors flanked the foyer and thick velvety sage carpeting wound its way up the stairs. In the kitchen, a large double window over looked the Connecticut River. They also had a perfect view of the Essex Steam Train, a local attraction; the consistant whistling reminded them of their time in Florida.
Her heart ached at the thought of losing the house; at the thought of all of the dreams that made up each nook and cranny; each little bit of character that came through when they designed the plans. It wasn’t so about the house, but the knowledge that though dreams may come true, they do not always last.
Like the spot in her heart, which she once reserved for him, the house they built on dreams would also soon be empty.
Thursday, December 29, 2005
Thursday, December 15, 2005
Part 9
He was working as an engineer on the steam train that day and looked particularly adorable in his light blue denim overalls. She loved the way he seemed born to drive the train-the way his soul actually glowed when he was in the cab, driving guests around the theme park on a train that was a piece of history.
On this day, the air was warmer than usual and the sun was relentlessly bright. The lack of a breeze made her skin sticky and she was very uncomfortable in her costume.
The train station was just above her work location, and when the trains were idol, she could see the engineers in their cabs. Three trains ran that day, and his was now in the station.
He tooted the whistle once, signifying that the train would be leaving shortly. It is a sound that will forever hold a special place in her heart-a high pitched steam infused toot, with the after effect of steam billowing out of the train. When she looked up at the station, he was leaning out of the cab, looking back at her.
“C’mon up!” he motioned.
She shook her head no and laughed, pointing to the turnstiles that she had to stay near.
“Come ride with me” he yelled, breaking the rules and calling attention to himself and to our courting.
“I can’t! I am not on break!” But as she said that, her relief came over and told her to take her break.
He gave her a thumbs up as he tooted the horn again, letting the conductors know that it was last call, the train would be leaving soon.
As she climbed the last step to the train station platform, he stepped out of the cab and extended his hand.
“You’re chariot awaits, my dear.” He said in his best Prince Charming voice.
She lowered her eyes and gave him her best “I want to be your Cinderella” look and finished it off with her sparkling smile. “Thank you” and she took his hand.
The inside of the train’s cab was extremely hot, as it was a true coal running steam train. Teams of 2 people drove the train in shifts throughout the day, maintaining the fire and keep a schedule. They also cooked hot dogs.
“Are you hungry?” he asked.“Yes, but I won’t have time to eat.”
“Sure you will” and he opened the hatch to reveal bright orange embers. Set on top was a tin foil packet filled with juicy hot dogs, waiting for her to indulge.
Laughing, she asked, “Did you plan this for us? A hot dog luncheon on this here train?” she asked in a Southern accent.
“Yes ma’am, I sure did! I even brought the buns!”
It was outrageously silly and off the wall things such as these that made her want to be near him. She wanted to soak up every detail of his quirky mind, of his crazy antics and unique sense of humor.
“Well, thank you. I do believe this is the craziest most original date I’ve ever had. And I love hot dogs!”
She stayed with him and his partner for 3 rounds and 2 hot dogs and then she had to go. Her shift was almost over and she wanted to be sure she relieved her friends before going home.
“Thanks again for lunch and the ride. It was a nice change. I really liked it.” She was beaming-obviously excited about the attention he was showering on her.
“Anytime. I’ll see you around, ok?” He looked around quickly, and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. It tasted salty, like the hot dogs they just ate for lunch.
As the train pulled away, she closed her green eyes and let the sounds and smells of the moment envelope her whole being, allowing her to once again appreciate how lucky she was to be standing where she was, and that the engineer of the train that was pulling away liked her.
On this day, the air was warmer than usual and the sun was relentlessly bright. The lack of a breeze made her skin sticky and she was very uncomfortable in her costume.
The train station was just above her work location, and when the trains were idol, she could see the engineers in their cabs. Three trains ran that day, and his was now in the station.
He tooted the whistle once, signifying that the train would be leaving shortly. It is a sound that will forever hold a special place in her heart-a high pitched steam infused toot, with the after effect of steam billowing out of the train. When she looked up at the station, he was leaning out of the cab, looking back at her.
“C’mon up!” he motioned.
She shook her head no and laughed, pointing to the turnstiles that she had to stay near.
“Come ride with me” he yelled, breaking the rules and calling attention to himself and to our courting.
“I can’t! I am not on break!” But as she said that, her relief came over and told her to take her break.
He gave her a thumbs up as he tooted the horn again, letting the conductors know that it was last call, the train would be leaving soon.
As she climbed the last step to the train station platform, he stepped out of the cab and extended his hand.
“You’re chariot awaits, my dear.” He said in his best Prince Charming voice.
She lowered her eyes and gave him her best “I want to be your Cinderella” look and finished it off with her sparkling smile. “Thank you” and she took his hand.
The inside of the train’s cab was extremely hot, as it was a true coal running steam train. Teams of 2 people drove the train in shifts throughout the day, maintaining the fire and keep a schedule. They also cooked hot dogs.
“Are you hungry?” he asked.“Yes, but I won’t have time to eat.”
“Sure you will” and he opened the hatch to reveal bright orange embers. Set on top was a tin foil packet filled with juicy hot dogs, waiting for her to indulge.
Laughing, she asked, “Did you plan this for us? A hot dog luncheon on this here train?” she asked in a Southern accent.
“Yes ma’am, I sure did! I even brought the buns!”
It was outrageously silly and off the wall things such as these that made her want to be near him. She wanted to soak up every detail of his quirky mind, of his crazy antics and unique sense of humor.
“Well, thank you. I do believe this is the craziest most original date I’ve ever had. And I love hot dogs!”
She stayed with him and his partner for 3 rounds and 2 hot dogs and then she had to go. Her shift was almost over and she wanted to be sure she relieved her friends before going home.
“Thanks again for lunch and the ride. It was a nice change. I really liked it.” She was beaming-obviously excited about the attention he was showering on her.
“Anytime. I’ll see you around, ok?” He looked around quickly, and gave her a quick kiss on the lips. It tasted salty, like the hot dogs they just ate for lunch.
As the train pulled away, she closed her green eyes and let the sounds and smells of the moment envelope her whole being, allowing her to once again appreciate how lucky she was to be standing where she was, and that the engineer of the train that was pulling away liked her.
Thursday, December 08, 2005
Part 8
"I'm going to start looking for a new job this week. Maybe in the city. I can live in Hoboken with my cousin until I find something of my own."
She was shocked. Although she knew that living in the same house as roommates would not be as easy at it sounded, she could not imagine having to live in their large house alone.
They built the house just four months earlier, but had been planning it for almost two years. Excitedly naive, they laid on their bed pouring over different house plans, dreaming of the children they would fill the rooms with. Modifications were made, rooms added, color swatches chosen-all for a house they were not yet even sure they could build. Her parents owned land, and talk of gifting it to her for as a wedding present made them sick with anticipation. When the time finally came, they not only knew which house they would build, but also which face plates they would have on their light switches. Life was that predictable.
"You're moving out? When?"
She couldn't help it-she sounded nervous. She hated letting him see how affected she was by the thought of being without him.
"I don't know. I have to find a job first. I can Hoboken until I find my own place if I get a job in the city. I'll just keep my things here and come back when I need them."
It irked her when he said things like that-just assuming that anything he did would be okay and that no one would ever question his thinking.
"If you move out, you're out. I can't keep having you come back and forth, never knowing when you'll be here and when you won't. That's no way to live."
"It's my house too. I'll keep things here if I want. I won't be living here and we both know I travel a lot so I won't be here for any significant amount of time. Besides, I pay for most of this house, don't forget."
He stared at her, daring her to counter him, daring her to argue so he could make her feel inferior.
And with that look, he defeated her always.
She was shocked. Although she knew that living in the same house as roommates would not be as easy at it sounded, she could not imagine having to live in their large house alone.
They built the house just four months earlier, but had been planning it for almost two years. Excitedly naive, they laid on their bed pouring over different house plans, dreaming of the children they would fill the rooms with. Modifications were made, rooms added, color swatches chosen-all for a house they were not yet even sure they could build. Her parents owned land, and talk of gifting it to her for as a wedding present made them sick with anticipation. When the time finally came, they not only knew which house they would build, but also which face plates they would have on their light switches. Life was that predictable.
"You're moving out? When?"
She couldn't help it-she sounded nervous. She hated letting him see how affected she was by the thought of being without him.
"I don't know. I have to find a job first. I can Hoboken until I find my own place if I get a job in the city. I'll just keep my things here and come back when I need them."
It irked her when he said things like that-just assuming that anything he did would be okay and that no one would ever question his thinking.
"If you move out, you're out. I can't keep having you come back and forth, never knowing when you'll be here and when you won't. That's no way to live."
"It's my house too. I'll keep things here if I want. I won't be living here and we both know I travel a lot so I won't be here for any significant amount of time. Besides, I pay for most of this house, don't forget."
He stared at her, daring her to counter him, daring her to argue so he could make her feel inferior.
And with that look, he defeated her always.
Thursday, December 01, 2005
Part 7
“So, have you figured it out yet? We’re in Sarasota. The beach!”
She laughed. “Yes, I figured it out. Is this the surprise? We’re going to the beach?”
“Yes, but not just any beach, this is the beach I grew up on. My parents own that condo up there and I’ve come here every year for as long as I can remember. I thought you’d like to see it. And, you haven’t seen water this blue, I am sure.”
“I’m honored to be here in your presence, on your beach, on this very day. Thank you.” She playfully said in an official sounding voice.
“Let’s go.” He said, and jumped out of the car.
They took off their shoes and ran to the sand. It was pure white, and softer than any sand her feet had ever touched. Being October, there was hardly anyone there, and it seemed as though they were the only two people in the entire world.
The water was, in fact, the bluest she’d ever seen; a beautiful hue of turquoise mixed with navy and capped with marshmallow white waves. The day was warm, but windy and the sky was crystal clear.
“You picked a perfect day for this. Thank you.” She said, and kissed him on the cheek.
He wrapped his arms around her waist and they hugged for a moment before continuing along the sand.Later, she would remember their time on the beach with fondness- remembering the pride she saw in his eyes when he shared a part of his life with her.
She’d remember how they sat in the sand, not caring about getting dirty, searching the waves for clues to their future, following the seagulls to their unknown destinations and knowing the only certainty they had in their relationship was that she was leaving in just two more months.
“Thank you.” She whispered, as they watched the sun retire in its pink and orange splendor.
“Thank you.”
She laughed. “Yes, I figured it out. Is this the surprise? We’re going to the beach?”
“Yes, but not just any beach, this is the beach I grew up on. My parents own that condo up there and I’ve come here every year for as long as I can remember. I thought you’d like to see it. And, you haven’t seen water this blue, I am sure.”
“I’m honored to be here in your presence, on your beach, on this very day. Thank you.” She playfully said in an official sounding voice.
“Let’s go.” He said, and jumped out of the car.
They took off their shoes and ran to the sand. It was pure white, and softer than any sand her feet had ever touched. Being October, there was hardly anyone there, and it seemed as though they were the only two people in the entire world.
The water was, in fact, the bluest she’d ever seen; a beautiful hue of turquoise mixed with navy and capped with marshmallow white waves. The day was warm, but windy and the sky was crystal clear.
“You picked a perfect day for this. Thank you.” She said, and kissed him on the cheek.
He wrapped his arms around her waist and they hugged for a moment before continuing along the sand.Later, she would remember their time on the beach with fondness- remembering the pride she saw in his eyes when he shared a part of his life with her.
She’d remember how they sat in the sand, not caring about getting dirty, searching the waves for clues to their future, following the seagulls to their unknown destinations and knowing the only certainty they had in their relationship was that she was leaving in just two more months.
“Thank you.” She whispered, as they watched the sun retire in its pink and orange splendor.
“Thank you.”
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